Preaching on Leviticus 1 at a wedding?

It’s not that I’m a masochist but I’ve always wondered how I would approach it. As a pastor and preacher I’ve been to tons of them and the wedding sermon usually covers the following passages

• Gen 2:18-25
• 1 Cor 13:4-13
• Ephesians 5:21-33
• 1 John 4:10-19
• Revelation 21:1-7

There are some odds one here and there but in the main the above passages are, to a large degree the set text for preaching at a wedding

Now I’ve got nothing against preaching on these passages. I use them as well but one wonders whether there is more we can say at a wedding than just these passages. Besides if you are in a marrying congregations as I have been, I think your congregation can only stomach so many rounds of 1 Cor 13. As well as this, not only will they get a dose of what you have to say, more than likely they’ll be invited by others, and the pastor will undoubtedly choose one of these passages.

So why these passages? We need to remember that they were never originally written for weddings, but for churches facing a lot of relational problems. In Corinth they were trying to out do the other person in spirituality. In the church John was writing to they also had relational problems. Sure enough Genesis 2, John 2, Ephesians and Revelation are more directly related, but apart from these it seems we have very little more to say. Of course time is a major problem. When you only have 10-15 minutes you can only say so much. So it’s understandable that we zoom in on passages which speaks more directly and pointedly about core issues related to marriage. But there in lies the problem. Doesn’t the WHOLE bible have something to say, directly or indirectly about marriage and not just these few passages?  In fact as I said, even the passages we commonly turn to are not really directly related to marriage. If we can make the connection between these passages and marriage could we not make the connection between marriage and the more “obscure”, if not seemingly unrelated passages? Undoubtedly the whole of scripture touches on the key issues of life that is relevant to all of us irrespective of our station in life.

OK so here is the challenge; What does Leviticus 1 have to say to a married couple if anything? Here’s my stab at it for what it’s worth in simple point form;

• God rescues his bride to be and brings her to himself (ie the exodus) but can they live happily ever after?
  
• It depends on whether they can own up and deal with the dark side of their relationship that will invariably tear them apart i.e. the problem of sin.  Instead, we only think of marriage in terms of kisses, flowers and romantics walks at sunset but never face the dark side of sin
  
• The sacrificing of animals regularly and daily is an extremely powerful and painful reminder of this dark side. The every day activity of slicing the animals throat, ripping out its insides, washing it and then burning it – the sight, sounds and smells tells us that sin cannot be ignored nor  is it a small matter. It is something that will destroy all relationships  – God/man and man/woman
  
• Sin cannot be ignored. It has to be dealt with, but dealing with sin is both costly and painfully yet very necessary.
• How do we deal with sin in marriage? God has dealt with our sin and the sin of our spouse. We need to therefore forgive.

Hmmm? Well it all comes back to Jesus doesn’t it but imagine talking about all the blood and gore at a romantic wedding. But instead of  jumping straight to 1John 4:10-19 we start with Leviticus 1.  It would really make an impact and graphically show the reality of sin and the need to deal with it. But when you think about it that’s what it was intended for in the beginning.

OK what do you think? Yes? No? Try a different angle? Or maybe I should just stick with 1 John 4:10-19 for the next 10 wedding sermons?

Why the Tiger’s fall reminds us of the gospel.

Well it’s hard not to miss all the media attention Tiger Woods has generated in a matter of a few days. Equally noticeable is the flurry of Christian responses to how we should respond to his fall. Not surprisingly the call, and the right call, is for us not to stand arrogant and to think that we are any better. There are so many passages in scripture which speaks to this issue. We need to be humble and to pray for this man’s restoration and reconciliation with his wife and family.

So really there is nothing more to add to this. I guess the only thing I’d say is that, unlike anything else, the fall of someone so well respected as Woods, unfortunate and tragic as it is, draws a sharp and clear distinction between the gospel and the world.

What is the normal response from our community to  Woods’ fall? On the one hand there are those who are completely indignant, furious, outraged and have lost all respect for him. They have looked to him as a good role model but now have felt totally betrayed by the revelation of his sins. As far as they’re concerned they don’t want to have anything to do with him ever again. There is no mercy, no grace and no forgiveness.

On the other hand there are those who, while they are do not like  or agree with what he has done, are nevertheless prepared to overlook it. They argue that because he has contributed so much to the golfing world and to charity, and since no one is perfect we should be prepared to give him a second chance.

The first response takes his transgression seriously and for this reason there is no hope but only continuing shame and condemnation.

In the second response there is hope of salvation but only by ignoring the seriousness of his transgression and the enormous hurt he has done to his family.

This is the conundrum our community finds itself in. It can only take sin seriously and thus condemn the sinner and with no hope of salvation, or else it provides salvation for the sinner, but only by ignoring or down playing the seriousness of the sin and the damage done to others.

In either case there is no justice or no salvation and ultimately no good news.

Over and against this stands the good news of the Lord Jesus Christ, for it offers BOTH Justice AND Salvation. In the gospel the sinner is soundly condemned yet at the same time there is the offer of real forgiveness. What Woods did was wrong and heinous. God condemns such actions without question. Yet at the same time God offers real forgiveness and grace. How does he combine the two? Because it is in the cross of Christ that God pours out his anger on the sinner. Yet it is in the same cross that God pours out his forgiveness to all who would repent and come to Him for forgiveness. I think this is nicely captured in the words of Paul the Apostle.

God presented him as a sacrifice of atonement, through faith in his blood. He did this to demonstrate his justice, because in his forbearance he had left the sins committed beforehand unpunished– he did it to demonstrate his justice at the present time, so as to be just and the one who justifies those who have faith in Jesus. Romans 3:25,26

This passage reminds us that the cross not only brings about our justification but also demonstrates God’s justice.

So back to all the talk about Woods. As mentioned in the beginning, the unfortunate fall of Tiger Woods makes clear the distinction between our community and the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ.

How do we respond? I think there are two ways to respond.

To those who want Tigers’ blood we need to show them there is always forgiveness and salvation in the cross of Christ.

To those who want to tell us to overlook his transgressions and to think about all the good he has done we need to remind them that God did not overlook it but took our sins so seriously that he was prepared to kill his one and only own son because of our sins, Tiger Woods included.

In the gospel both Justice and salvation meet. And isn’t that what the good news of the Lord Jesus is all about?

Preaching to our modern world

I remember meeting a guy who was aiming to be a TM Master (Transcendental Meditation Master). We got talking and then I invited him out for coffee, hoping to share the gospel with him. Anyway he kindly gave me the opportunity. After rattling off the gospel track I have been using for over 20 yrs (Two Ways to Live), at the end of my speel, to my astonishment he affirmed everything I said saying that this is what he believes. Now at this point either I knew there was something majorly wrong here but I couldn’t work out.  So I asked him to explain to me what he believed. It was a real eye opener. He was using words and concept that was so strange that it took me nearly two hours of hard listening just to understand his world view.(I know I’m pretty slow) He talked about Brahman (I only know of Bradman but who is Brahman), Atman, Karma, moksha, infinite, consciousness. I was getting a head from all this weird talking.  Then it dawned to me that we were talking a totally different language, and I’m not talking about Chinese vs. English (my friend was an Aussie dabbling in eastern mysticism), but the world of east and west as well as of TM and the Judeo Christian framework. He was using different words, ideas and a totally foreign worldview that was completely strange to me and I didn’t know how to respond.

In many ways this highlights the difficulty many Christians have when trying to communicate the gospel to our modern world. Too often we are unaware, if not completely naive that many of our words and concepts, while relatively familiar to our church members are quite strange and foreign to outsiders. Our language is an in-house language that only those in the know know how to interpret it. As well as this we share a common way of looking at the world. But we often forget that most people do not speak like us and think like us.

This ignorance arises from the fact that most times the only people we hang around with are Christian or at least church friends. And because of this,  unconsciously we drift in to talking our in-house language. We talk about “Church”, “ministry”, “house parties”( ie church retreat for those in a different church tradition). We talk about “holy Communion”, diaconate, wardens, offertory, trespasses   and a whole host of other Christian or church things. Since this is how we “normally” talk with those we “normally” hang around with ie Christians, then when we encounter unbelievers, or unchurched people, we struggle to know how to talk to them about the gospel, except with our in-house language. And because of this  it’s not surprising that this only reinforces in the minds of many the  perception that our message is  unintelligible or  irrelevant. This state of affairs invariably only leads to misunderstanding as to what Christians are all about. If people can’t make out what we’re saying then the only natural thing to do is to interpret things in ways that we are familiar with which is anything and everything other than the gospel.

But the struggle to communicate the gospel to others is not merely a problem we have with unbelievers. It is also a problem we have even with our own church members. I remember sometime ago when I was reading the bible to my children, I was saying to them that Jesus lives in us. At this point one of my daughters looked down at her chest with a quizzical look and was feeling around for something. When I said that Jesus lives in us she took that literally and so was try to feel for Jesus. Again when I was saying to my children that God is everywhere one daughter asked “Are we sitting on God?”.

What this highlights is that understanding the gospel is one thing but communicating it to others, indeed to our modern world is a completely different thing. I know that understanding the gospel is a work of the Holy Spirit, but on our part, when I listen to how Christians (and I’m talking about genuine believers and dear brothers and sisters in Christ) explain their faith, I wonder how much of the confusion is caused by our inability to speak the language of the world.

The challenge then is to explain and communicate the gospel in words, ideas and with a framework that the other party can understand. It is all too easy, but may not be helpful, to explain the gospel in a way that “I” can understand. However this is only half the story. I need to communicate the gospel in a way that OTHERS can understand. And this OTHER  is a very different and diverse group. Now I know that we live in a diverse society, but too often I do not appreciate how diverse this society is. I’m use to preaching the gospel to someone who has some vague judeo Christian background. At least we have a similar frame of reference. But trying to explain the gospel to a Buddhist or a Hindu is a completely different story altogether. The way they look at the world and even speak is just so out of this world.

So how do we do it? Very simple – we listen. Too often we are quick to speak and far too slow to listen. In our eagerness to preach the gospel we can forget the simple rule to listen first, understand second and then share. Listening to how our friends speak, the words they use, the ideas they have  is a wonderful teacher in educating us how to speak to them. But while listening is one thing, it doesn’t stop there. We need  to take the gospel that has been handed down to us and repackage it using their words, ideas and a framework that they are familiar with. This is not an easy task itself. We can make the mistake of listening but then explain the gospel still using our words and ideas and framework, when in fact we need work with their words and their worldview.

One thing I try to do now and then when preaching is to talk to others and to different sorts of people about my sermon and ask them if they understand what I’m getting at. This will inform me as to whether my words connect and my concepts make sense.

Anyway after listening to my TM friend for two intense hours I finally got an idea of how to approach it, so I began to explain the gospel using his words, ideas and world view. It was a very strange experience having to talk about the 7 States of consciousness, Brahman, Atman, Karma, Reincarnation to bring out the gospel.  Anyway when I finished talking he responded:  “I don’t agree with that. That’s not possible!”. Now I knew we we’re talking!

So can I suggest, if we want to preach the gospel to our modern world, we need to get out and start rubbing shoulders with the world and do some intense listening. It’s not easy but vital.

Making Marriage Work – Part 3

Making a marriage work. It’s hard work and everyone has their ABC but I have my 7 M’s. Here are the last three of my 7 M’s for making a marriage work.

Mother-in-laws: To make a marriage work, love and respect your mother-in-laws but don’t let them rule your marriage. Now why mother-in-laws? Firstly because it works with the M’s. Lame reason I know so please excuse me on this. And to all the mother-in-laws out there who are really good – my apologies. That being said i think there is some truth (and I emphasize SOME) that mother-in-laws are prone to interfere more with their children’s marriage than the father-in-law. Not always the case, but in many cases. Why is this the case? Something to muse over at a later date or posting.

That aside I think there are a few points we need to remember:

1. Be careful of trying to please your parents over and against your spouse. It is still important to honour our parents. That is being biblical, but the danger of many is that they are more concerned about pleasing their parents than their spouse.
2. Be careful never to criticize your spouse in front of your parents. Even if the criticisms are just and fair, do that in the privacy of your own home, never in public.
3. Be careful to always defend your spouse against the criticism and demands of your parents. And even if the criticisms might be true, it is still important to show your undying love and support for your spouse. If the criticisms are fair and just then refer back to point 2.

Making Out: Everyone knows that sex is crucial in making a marriage work. Even though it’s a very fleeting moment in marriage, it is nevertheless a very vital ingredient without which a marriage will very quickly run into trouble (1 Cor 7:5). That being said what is important is not just having sex but the way we have sex, and  I’m not talking about Karma Sutra. I’m talking about being godly and generous. Paul reminds us that our bodies are not our own but belongs to our spouse (1 Cor 7:4,5) In other words sex becomes not only a means of pleasure, but equally important a means by which I serve my spouse.

This is clearly demonstrated in how differently a man and a woman is wired. We know they are different, but this differences goes even as far as the way both men and women have sex. As we know, for the man the way he has sex can be compared to a light switch. He can get turned on so quickly it’s not funny. He could be in the middle of the final episode of Halo 3 and then his wife comes in in a sexy lingerie – well forget halo – he’s suddenly all turned on. For men sex is also a stress reliever. If a husband has not had sex for a long time he gets really aggro. Alternatively if he is stressed out, sex can often be a great stress reliever. But if he can get turned on very quickly, he can very very quickly cool down. So once he’s had his sex he can very quickly get back to his Halo 3 as if nothing has happened.(Not surprisingly the wife would feel quite ripped off)

On the other hand for a woman, sex can be compared to turning on an iron. It really takes a long time to warm up and a long time to cool down. For a woman sex is all about relationship. She can only have sex when she is in the mood, when she knows she is loved and when the environment is right. Everything has to be right for her. In short the guy is fast and the girl is slow. Uggh. Why did God have to make it complex?  Wouldn’t it be better if we both approached sex the same way? Well yes and no. If the man and woman were the same then it would be a lot easier. We don’t have to think about anything else but just having fun. But that’s the problem. Because we don’t have to think about it  then the only thing we’ll be thinking about is having fun. We’d forget about the needs of the other person because we don’t need to think about it. We can just enjoy the moment and think about nothing but my own pleasure. But by the very fact that both the man and woman are totally opposite, then it means I have to stop and think about how to have sex. And I have to think about it in a way that will serve my wife’s sexual needs and not just my own.  Because God has made us so different, indeed so totally opposite, I have to stop and think about what is good for my wife, even in the area of sexual needs.

So making out in a godly generous way where I remember I am here to serve my spouse even in the area of sex is a key to making marriage work. When we are both thinking about how to serve each other then we’re in a win win situation. But when we are both thinking about our own needs then we both loose out. When you think about it, the way God has wired us up so differently forces us to remember one important principle of relationships – it’s all about being generous and concerned for the needs of the other person. Wow isn’t God wise!

Ministry: To make a marriage work we need to remember that we are first called to serve God over and above my spouse. I remember one wise minister once said that the key to loving your wife is to love God first, and the key to loving your children is to love your wife. One temptation I find newly couples falling into is that they become so wrapped up in each other that they forget about bible study group, going to Sunday service and serving the church. While I think there are some who have gone to such an extreme that they are involved in ministry to the detriment of their marriage, I think there are many more who are so wrapped up in their marriage that they have no time to serve God, his people or the world God has called us to save. Learning to serve God is a key to making a marriage work. but it is also important because it puts a check on our tendency to worship our work. When we realise that God is our first priority it places work in its right place and in so doing it gives me time to serve my wife.
Ok so this is my 7 M’s

• Manhood – be a man, be a leader, be like Jesus
• Motherhood – value being a mother and being a woman
• Mates – we will never win this race on our own but with our mates
• Money – learn how to give
• Mother-in-laws – Spouse first,  in-laws second
• Making out – sex is about giving not getting
• Ministry – Loving our spouse is found by loving God first

Making Marriage Work – Mates and Money – Part 2

With so many marriage falling apart how do you build a strong marriage? This is  part 2 of the 7 M’s for making marriage work.

Mates: To build a strong marriage it’s important to have good mates. We keep thinking that building a strong marriage is a private affair between husband and wife. However we need to remember that we will not win this merely on our own but in the company of others. In other words it is crucial, absolutely crucial to surround ourselves with good friends who will keep us accountable in our marriage and keep us going strong for the long haul. Too many marriages fall apart because the couple wants to keep the problems to themselves, never wanting to or willing to talk to others about their difficulty. And when they eventually do, the cancer is spread too far for any remedy to be effective. I was reading an article in the Sydney Morning Herald some years ago where it said that most people come to marriage counselling when it’s too late. Many of the marriages could have been saved if they had talked about their problems with others very early in the marriage. I guess people feel there is a certain stigma when a marriage runs into rough waters. But let’s face it. No marriage is trouble free. There are no prizes for those who say they never argue. The winners are those who argue but are able to deal with their problems.

Now here I want to say a particular word to the man because more often than not it’s the man who has this problem.  I’ve counselled many people about their marriage problems but you don’t have to be an Einstein to guess who took the first step to approach me to talk about their marriage – Yep it was the wife. In 9/10 times it’s the wife who makes the first move. And in most cases the man refuses to talk about it. So the dear wife is stuck. She wants to sort things out but the man either refuses to talk about the problem or lives in denial. Whatever the reason when the man refuses to talk it’s very hard to sort out the problem. As they say, it takes two to tango.

So if you’re having problems in the marriage, stop being a jerk. Stop being proud. Be a man and talk to a mate about it. But make sure the mate cares, not only for you but also for your marriage. Too many mates are idiots. They are too quick to take sides. Find mates who care, not only for you, but for your marriage.

Money: To make marriage work we eventually have to cross that danger zone – Money. Selfishness and greed is a sure killer for marriage. So getting our attitude to money is crucial. However in my observation most of the advice we give in this area usually turns on how to make sure the couple budgets well so that they  don’t get into strife and therefore cause all sorts of heartache for themselves  further down the line. This is OK but it’s still unrealistic in many ways. No matter how well we prepare ourselves there is no way we can guarantee financial security. I think Ecclesiastes 9:11, 12 has a powerful word to say to us here

I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favour to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all. Moreover, no man knows when his hour will come: As fish are caught in a cruel net, or birds are taken in a snare, so men are trapped by evil times that fall unexpectedly upon them. Ecclesiastes 9:11,12

So while I’m all for financial planning we can never know for certain what lies around the corner. So what then should we be saying to married couples about money? I think when talking to couples about money we need to teach them, not only how to save, but more importantly how to give money away to others in need. If we smart, learning to save comes naturally. There are lots and lots of institutions out to teach you how to invest wisely. But rarely is there anyone out there who will teach you how to give money away generously. I think learning this lesson is crucial in making a marriage work. Why is this? Because when we learn to be generous with our money, we learn to be generous to each other in every other way. Our attitude to each other is often painfully revealed in our attitude towards money. How many divorce settlements have had bitter fights over property and money? Too many. And what about that prenuptial agreements? It’s all about protecting MY money from the other person? What does that say about my spouse? Learning to be generous is a sure killer against workaholism, against the increasing pressure to get more and more. Learning to be generous with our money eventually flows into every area of our lives.

Many marriages fight over money. So teaching couples  to generous with their money to those in need is a recipe to ensuring that money never divides. And a marriage marked by generosity is surely a marriage made in heaven. So the key issue in talking about money is learning to be generous.

OK this is the second part of my 7 M’s for making a marriage work. Stay tuned for the last three.

Making Marriage Work: Manhood and Motherhood – Part 1

Everyone has their ABC about how to build a strong marriage, so over the next 3 blogs I want to offer  my ABC reflections, but it’s not really an ABC, but really 7 M’s.

Here are the first two.

Manhood: Firstly men need to be men. By this I mean the man needs to recognise that he is the spiritual leader of the household and to act like one. I see far too many men, both Christian and non, who are more a mummy’s boy rather than a man. There are far too many men being led by their wives rather than leading their wives. The funny, if not sad thing I find, is that many of the wives who are wearing the paints in the home wish their husband would rise up and be the man and the leader of the household. Now it probably needs to be said that it’s very easy to abuse our leadership to  mean something like an autocratic or dictator. There are already too many men like this. However by spiritual leadership I mean we need to be the man and to be like Jesus. And you know how Jesus led his church? We need men to be like this. So what does that mean? Take the initiative to read the scriptures and to pray with your wives. The number of women who have shared with me how they wish their husband will take a lead in these things is countless and tragic. Take the initiative. Say to your wife: “Let’s read the scriptures and pray!” That’s not too hard to say is it?

Motherhood: A second key to building a strong marriage is to value motherhood.  Now it’s strange to talk about Motherhood and marriage, but when I read the scriptures, there is a very strong connection between being a woman and being a mother. It’s worth noting that with all the push by the feminists to dissolve any and all differences between men and women one of the casualties has been over child rearing and motherhood. Today’s feminists are pushing for equal opportunities in the work place and for equal pay. Many women want recognition for their achievements and success in the business world etc. In all this, motherhood is not good enough if not an unfortunate burden in their quest for recognition and status. So many will sacrifice being a mother for the sake of their careers. In short to be a real women is not about being a mother (or even the desire)  but about having same job opportunities as men.

While I’m all for acknowledging that women are equal, something clearly taught in the scriptures (Galatians 3:28), the bible also recognises that we are different.  Men are marked by work where as women are marked by motherhood. Now, please please don’t get me wrong because I can see it already coming. I’m not saying that women can’t work. I think they definitely can. There are many examples in the bible of women who held a job. Proverbs 31 is the classic example.  And I’m not saying that fathers should not be involved in rearing their children. Again the bible has a very high role of the father in raising children. However it seems that, as a matter of emphasis the man is the worker and the women is marked by motherhood. Of course there are many women who desperately want one but can’t. But this only adds weight to the argument that motherhood (or at least the desire)  is one of the defining characteristics of being a women. Recall that the curse on man was with respect to his work (Gen 3:17-19), while the curse on the woman was with respect to giving birth (Gen 3:16).

OK enough of this. So where am I going with this? The point I’m trying to make is for women to recognise their role as women and their calling to be a mother (if possible), and to stop trying to compete or to be a like a man. Too many women see motherhood as a hindrance. They want to be like the man – get a good highly respected, high flying well paid career. Admittedly and sadly  too many men think like this. However when  women start thinking like this, there is always a danger of the woman  competing with the husband. And when the kid comes they’ll resent it profusely and resent their husband because, while they are jet setting around the world (I’m not saying this is good)  she is stuck at home with the kid.  But if women recognise the value and the importance and the high calling of motherhood, it can save a lot of conflict in marriage. In short,  just as a man is called to be a man, so the women is called to be a women. To confuse the two roles, as we see it so often in the world today, is the source of so much heartache and broken marriages.

Oh yes just one note: Motherhood only ever works for women when the husband is 120% behind the wife in this – and by this I don’t mean just bringing in the money. Some husband thinks this is all it is. Rather I mean that the husband, when he comes home is not straight into the TV or to the computer games, or into his hobbies, while the wife is struggling to clean, cook and take care of the kid. If you’re like this you deserve a big kick up the behind. No! To be 120% behind your wife means when you come home after work you realise that the work does not stop. You go straight into the kitchen to help with the cooking, straight into the bedroom to help with bathing the baby. You help vacuum the house, wash the clothes etc etc. Women will value motherhood more when they realise their greatest fan and supporter is their husband. Women will love being a mother when their husbands UNDERSTAND what it means to be a mother.

OK this is the first of my two M’s for making a great marriage.

Loving each other even if it stings like hell.

What’s going on? Over the years I’ve come across case after case of ministers resigning from one church after another. I’ve heard of Christians flatting out that has ended in less than favourable terms. I’ve heard of squabbling between leaders and of Christians who struggled to work with each other. And sadly such incidences does not seem to be petering off. If anything I’m sure what I’ve heard and seen is just the tip of the iceberg. So I’ve got to ask myself “What’s going on?” What’s wrong with the church today?

My thoughts are that this is normal. I’m not saying it’s good, nor am I saying it’s acceptable. I’m merely saying that this is what life is like and this is what the church is like.

We keep expecting the church to be the perfect bride she was called to be and a place where everyone comes to church, smiles at each other, say nice things and are always wiling to help. Well I think the church is a lot better than the groups I’ve been in, but I think we might be living in dream land for  this. As I said I think the Christian community is very different to the communities of the world. HOWEVER she is not perfect. Indeed she can be a pain in the %^&&*%^& until Jesus returns.

Until such time, sin is still a major problem. Remember that our sanctification is not a one night wonder. How we wish it were, but it isn’t. It will take a life time of work. Which means that there will still be greed, selfishness, anger, jealousy etc etc. You name it the church will have it. However because the spirit of God dwells in his people, they will improve (Over time) but it can be slow and painful as God teaches us to grow up.

What are we to do in the meantime? Well Jesus tells us doesn’t he:?

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34,35

We all know the commandment, but what we forget is that by the very fact that Jesus has to say it means that it is not something we will find easy to do. It’s worth remembering that the bible has to repeat this over and over again, and Jesus has to pray for Christian unity (John 17) etc etc, which means that learning to love one anotehr is a particularly difficult and painful work. Just think about all the letters in the NT. A constant and repeated theme is the need to love one another. The bible harp on this not because we are particularly good at this, but rather because we are so bad at it.

In 1 Cor 12:31 Paul reminds them that love is the most excellent way, rather than being loaded up with lots of spiritual gifts.  Remember that 1 Cor 13 (that famous passage about love)  was not written for a wedding about a couple madly in love with each other. Rather it was written to a church riddled with strife.

And remember that great passage about the fruit of the spirit in Galatians 5:22-25. Just before this he encourages them to stop trying to kill each other. (Gal 5:15).

And do you also remember that great statement in 1 John 4:10 about what love is: “This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” Again when you read this short letter it becomes very clear that they had difficulties loving each other.

Remember that the Ephesians had racism. The Philippians had the problem between Syntyche, and Euodia (Philippians 4:2). Titus had to qell the unrest in the churches in Crete (Titus 1:10,11)

Oh yes and don’t forget James. Listen to how much fighting there was going on in that church:

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. James 4:1,2

I’m sure they weren’t literallly killing each other but to use such strong tones suggest that things were not good in the church. The list goes on and on and on.

So what do we do in the meantime when someone in the church has a go at us, says malicious word, is selfish, unkind, uncharitable, ungracious, etc etc? We need to take heed of our lord’s word:

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” John 13:34,35

We need to remember that he didn’t love us because we were so loving. He loved us even though loving us was the last thing we deserved – but that’s grace isn’t it. I guess in the same way we are called to love each other, but what makes Christian love so unique is that we are commanded to love each other even if it stings like hell. Hmmm…. I guess that’s what Jesus had to go through for us and thus what he calls us to do. Tough call!

Stop organising evangelistic events and start evangelising.

I was talking to someone about their ministry and  their plans for next year. They spelt out their bible study program for the group, the topics they’ll be working through, and what they hope to train people in. Oh, yes they also talked about organising some evangelistic meetings during the year. At this I asked if they had thought through a mission/evangelism strategy to engage with our community to which he said “They hadn’t thought much about this.”

The tragedy I observe in many churches is that we spend more time organising an evangelistic event than actually doing the evangelism itself. Now I’m not against organising these events. I’ve organised heaps and will probably organise many before I go to glory. However my beef is when the event consumes all our time and energy so much so that very little time is given to helping people engage with our community. Organising an evangelistic event is a great thing. It can certainly give us a real sense of being part of God’s work in reaching the world. However it can also subtly distract us from reaching the world. Organising an event is cushy. But talking to friends about Jesus is scary stuff. Organising an event can give you a real high particularly when it’s well run, but explaining why people are under the judgement of God and in need of rescue can be very costly, particularly in terms of personal relationships. So it’s no wonder that it’s far easier to get people to help organise something that to go and talk to people about Jesus

Think of all the man-hours we spend setting up an event and then translate that into hours that could be used to train and help people share the gospel with their friends? Now again, don’t get me wrong. I’m not against having well run evangelistic events. I think some of the evangelistic meetings I’ve seen are so poorly run it could be used as a solution to insomnia. (Ok I need to remember that God’s is sovereign and works inspite of us. Thanks for the reminder. )  But I think something is seriously wrong when all the energy is put into this and very little is directed to training people to engage with those around them and to proclaim the gospel in a clear, relevant and interesting way.

In fact when you think about it, evangelistic events work best when the congregation is fired up to do evangelism. When the congregation is NOT doing their part, in most cases, the evangelistic event will merely be preaching to the converted. Yes it’s great that the converted hear the gospel preached regularly and frequently. But that being said, as an event for unbeliever, I think often times it seems we’re doing a very poor job.

So  please,  don’t let the Evangelistic event become the excuse not to evangelize.Don’t let the event overtake the evangelism.

Let’s ditch the Sunday Worship service….?

OK the title might seem a bit strong  but I think, given the way our society is moving, we need to review our Sunday service time slot. By this I’m not saying we need to rethink what we do  in our Sunday worship services (Although I think we probably do need to look at this as well, but that’s for another day) but rather WHEN we meet as a community. The reality is that it’s getting harder and harder to invite friends to church on Sundays. Like many other churches we have our evangelistic services, or as some would like to call it, “Guest services”, yet when I look at the actual number of newcomers at these special services it’s usually a handful if that. There are many reasons for this. Some members are basically slack. Others just don’t have any friends they can invite. But I think an increasingly number have friends who basically just can’t make Sunday’s, even if they wanted to come.

Growing up in Sydney Australia in the 60’s/70’s life was very simple and slow. All the shops were closed around 5:30 pm and there was nothing opened on the weekends. The private schools probably still had their Saturday sports but that was only the private schools and back in those days far fewer people went to private schools. Tuition was not as big as it is today. Movies were closed, shopping centres were closed. Everything was closed on the weekends and so there wasn’t a lot of competition or distractions. But today it’s a totally different story

• Shops are opening longer hours, meaning many people have no choice but to work on Sunday otherwise they’ll loose their jobs
• Weekend shopping is a given, and given that people are busier, many do their shopping on Sundays
• Movies are open every day
• Sport was once confined to Saturday but now Sunday sport is becoming a regular feature
• More people are travelling interstate and overseas more frequently for work
• Shift work is a bigger thing and it’s no longer confined to process workers. Because of globalisation, business are now working 24/7 because their business’ involve people around the world, which means that workers are having to work crazy hours
• Tuition is a bigger thing today than ever before so many kids are now at school 6 days if not 7 days a week
• Everyone is now having their parties and weddings on Sundays
• Because everyone is busy, Sunday is often family day.

Society and the world has changed dramatically. Anecdotedly I’ve talked to all sorts of people which confirms how much things have changed.

• A person has two mildly disable children and has to take them to physio on Saturday and many other activities. She is totally wasted on Sundays. It truly is her only day off
• A person has Saturday sport, and now Sunday sports and so cannot come on Sundays
• A person loves his golf and has it on Sundays with friends
• A person is in the hospitality industry and has to work on Sundays
• A person sets up sound equipment for concerts and functions and many of these are held on Sundays
• A person is on the IT help desk for clients around the world and thus work hours that works for their overseas customers
• I was talking to some young high school kids who shared with me that their friends have tuition on Sundays
• A person has a shop in Westfield and because of Westfield policy has to stay open on Sundays
• A person is a restaurant worker and obviously works on Sundays

The list can go on and on and on but I think you get my drift.

If we’re going to reach our community with the gospel, then we’re going to have to rethink our Sunday worship service. To confine “Church” to Sunday effectively excludes a very large sector of our community. Now of course I don’t want to throw the proverbial baby out with the bath water. I’m not saying that Sundays is a bad time slot. I think Sundays still works for many people. But for many others it just doesn’t work.

There are no easy answers, but whatever answer we come up with we have to recognise that church cannot just meet on Sundays.We’re going to have to think very seriously about setting up church at different times and days of the week.

Here is one brilliant idea I came across. One organisation was set up to reach the restaurant workers in Sydney. Because of the restaurant workers’ crazy work hours Sunday was  too hard. As well as this many could not go to a regular bible study group during the week, so a church was set up for them that met on Tuesdays at 11:00 pm in the evening.

So maybe it’s time to think outside the box and try starting church on another day or another time in addition to Sundays? OK this is just some personal reflections…

A call to die for the church even when she’s not worth it

It still astonishes me how many of us in full time ministry, myself included keep forgetting the cross in our ministry. By this I don’t mean that we’ve don’t preach it anymore (Although sadly there are many who have done just this). Rather what I mean is that many in ministry forget that ministry is about taking up the cross, and not only preaching it.

There are many who have this silly and stupid idea that ministry is suppose to be exciting, enjoyable, fun, satisfying and fulfilling. Many have this crazy idea that we will respected (well at least by the church) because we are God’s servant and preachers of the gospel, where we’ll be well looked after and reasonably paid and where the people we work with are really nice, lovely, friendly, warm and on the same page as us. This would be nice wouldn’t it? So it’s a surprise when many discover, to their horror they are experiencing something quite the opposite.  They suddenly discover that it is very  hard  work and often very thankless. The people you minister to only ever seem to complain, complain, complain. Others criticize. No one wants to help,  expecting you to do everything and to be at their beck and call. Not only this you’re suddenly confronted with unjust and untrue accusations from people who do not like you. You have great plans to serve grow the church and expands God’s kingdom but you’re facing a wall of politic. To clinch this, your stipend just   !@$!@#!@#! . At the end of the day despite trying to do the right thing by people people do not like you. Now I’m sure there are many cases where the pastor really deserves the criticism. Some pastors are really that bad. Yet there are many who are trying to do the right thing yet the church is making hell for them.

In such cases the tendency is to quit and find a happier environment to work in where you’ll be respected, looked after and the people like you. Ok I’m all for this. Let’s face who wants to be a masochist? Not me! But let’s face it, should we be surprised to think that ministry should be so hard, difficult and so thankless?

It seems to me that most of us are psychologically and theologically prepared to be a martyr for the world. Jesus reminded us that the world will hate us because it first hated him. OK let’s die for the world   But very few of us are totally prepared when we discover that, not only does the world hate us , but so does the church. And we are totally floored when most of the attacks comes from brothers and sisters in Christ. This is something we’re not prepared for. We keep saying to ourselves “I did not sign up for this crap and !@#!@#!@” Yet I want to say that this is precisely what we signed up for.

As ministers of the gospel our call is to present everyone PERFECT in Christ (Colossians 1:28,29). This is the goal of all ministry and it is no small calling. Trying to help a person grow spiritually is hard enough. However growing them until they are PERFECT in Christ is way out of our league. This is why Paul reminds us that we can only set about this task because of the power of God which mightily works in and through us.

That being said, it seems to me that we keep forgetting that until such a time, we are dealing with people are who far from perfect. By this I don’t mean that people are always making mistakes. We’ve all heard the line thrown around when people make mistakes “No one’s perfect!”. Ok I think we can accept people who make mistakes. That’s not a problem. However when the bible says we are not perfect, it is saying something much stronger. It is saying that we are still sinners. Yes we have been saved, forgiven, reconciled, restored and are being transformed. Yes are are loved and are the children of God, but nevertheless we are still sinful people. What does this mean? It means we can and often are rude, unloving, greedy, selfish, grumblers, rebellious, idolatrous, immoral, violent, filled with rage, divisive, slanderers, gossipers. The list goes on and on and on. To say that we are far from being perfect like Jesus is not a cute phrase to throw around at people who simply make mistakes. Rather it is to say that we still have so much of the characteristics of this sinful rebellious world in us. In all that we do, say and think we are very much like the world. (And you know how the bible describe the world?) Which is why all the NT writers had to keep saying one thing over and over again “Don’t be like the world!”

So what’s our role? It is to take this lot of people and to lovingly and painstaking break their addiction with the world, weed out their sinful habits, purge out their idolatry, help them to forgive each other, expose the lies of the devil, teach them the truths of God and present them perfect in Christ. You see, our work is not done in heaven where everyone is nice, warm and loving to each other. Quite the contrary. Our work is done on earth where people, not least the church is still a bundle of problems and a real headache. This is the real environment where we do their work and in this environment the ministers of the gospel can and are often the object of ridicule even in the church.

If people were like Jesus they wouldn’t need us. But because people and the church is far from being like Jesus, then we need leaders who will teach the word of God, pray for the people, be a model for them and be prepared to die for her even when she hardly seems worth it. Well at least Jesus was prepared to do this!